The special secret that I was excitedly hoping to announce to the world on our 3rd Wedding Anniversary, unfortunately has become heart break instead. Grief catches me out when I least expect it. I feel my eyes welling up at work, driving the car, cooking dinner. The painful emptiness within my soul doesn't go away.
On top of our insanely turbulant, mixed up world of unreliable and untrustworthy family members, of parenting orders, affidavits, criminal courts, and family courts, we suffered another devastating personal tragedy.
Those who have not experienced this type of loss, tell me "it was meant to be". Those who understand, tell me take time to grieve. Sadly, we have been here before, perhaps too many times these past few years.
I am just so incredibly sad, it feels like my soul is drowning in my tears. I never had the opportunity to look into your eyes, and tell you that I loved you. You didn't see the tremendous joy in your father's eyes when told of your existence. With long sensitive tender fingers, he traced the barest hint of changes to your mother's body, the smile of wonder ever present. You were loved every day of your incredibly short life.
I know an Angel never dies, you live in our hearts forever.
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